they all come crawling back

Okay, so this isn't exactly men crawling back to me, begging for me to take them back but, fuck it, it made me feel special (and secretly, drunkenly wanted by ex-boyfriends).

Zach, the high school into college boyfriend of 3 years, texted me Friday night and said:

You're pretty.

That was all. Nothing huge, nothing drastic. But because I know him oh so well and for years he has begged (literally, in the form of an 8 page handwritten love letter, begged) to get back together, I know that when he calls, or texts, or IMs, or facebooks, it's all bad news in the world of Zach. Poor kid really has never gotten over me. And I'm not just saying this. He's told me, many times. He's told me year after year that he's tried to get over me, and tried to date other people but alas, no one compares to yours truly.

It makes me feel terrible, poor kid. Secretly I love it. Hahaha, of course I do. I'm evil and love knowing that people are still hung up on me.

Okay so that's that. I asked him the next day if he knew he sent that, and he did the whole "uh, yea, I think" aka he was wasted but you know what they always say:
A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts.
Or at least I think that's how it goes, I don't know.

Also on Friday night, or Saturday morning however you'd like to see it, Ryan P sent me a(n) (obviously drunk) IM at 4:35am.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup.

Oh really? So we can have the same lovely conversation that we had Tuesday night over drunk text messages where I (or you) say totally embarrassing completely insincere things? Oh I don't think so. See I wasn't drunk Friday night and I would never think of telling him those things when I'm sober. Partially to save my face, but more importantly because I really don't mean those things.

I don't really like Ryan P. But since he is unavailable, of course I occasionally dream. Again, I like the attention. Kill me. I like feeling desired. And truth is, sometimes you feel most desired when the attention is from another woman's man. Again, sue me... I'm a horrible person.